Find your therapy.
When you see or hear the word therapy, what comes to mind?
Lying in a couch talking to a shrink? Someone asking you, “How do you feel about that?”
Yeah well some of that is true I guess, but for me, therapy is something that helps me clear my mind. Relax. Process what you’re going through.
And that can look different for everyone.
Yesterday my therapy consisted of running 18 miles with some girlfriends. The three hour and eight minute run was filled with tears, smiles, laughs, and much needed silence.
My father in law (Dad II) came to mind a lot. I’m struggling with the strong emotions of his sudden passing and have been lying on the couch each night this past week feeling sad and unmotivated.
But yesterday’s run was very therapeutic. I got to replay our last days together. Remember his fun smile and twinkle in his eye. Sure, it made me cry and my fellow trail sisters had to help me pull myself together, but it helped.
Sitting home on the couch, avoiding my feelings will just lead to more depression for me, and I’ll spiral downward.
So for me, running is therapy. What’s yours?
Unlock the doors.
Doors open and close on us throughout our lives. Some when get slammed. It can start to dictate our actions. Ever notice that?
Like if a door shut on an opportunity once or twice, you might quit trying.
As an author, doors are often shut to me for various reasons. The story didn’t click with the editor. Timing wasn’t right. Characters are too old for YA or too young for adult. The romance isn’t steamy enough. Couldn’t connect with characters.
See. That’s lots of doors shut. I should quit, right? Why even try anymore?
I’ve been tempted to quit before, but the stories keep coming. So I keep writing. If anything, I write to quiet the voices in my head as Lord Byron says.
Don’t let the doors shutting stop you, my friends. Forge a key and unlock the doors.
I know I may never hit a bestseller list again, and that’s ok. I love writing. Telling stories. Talking to readers. So I’ll keep doing it. I’ll keep unlocking the doors with each story I write.
Stay strong, my friends.
Waste some time.
Ever notice that when we’re laying around we often say, “Oh, I should be doing something.” Or maybe thinking, I’m wasting time, I should be doing something productive.
You might be doing exactly what you need to be doing, and that’s resting.
That’s important. Did you know that while training to run my ultra marathons my
coach works in rest days. Rest weeks even.
They are the key to training, making your muscles stronger since you’re giving them recovery time to build up.
If you go, go, go you will either get injured or burn out (become over trained).
So next time you’re wasting time, it might be ok.
Find strength in your mistakes.
Some of the strongest people I know have gotten that way from their poor choices.
We’ve all made bad choices and some of the consequences of those have hurt. Badly in some cases.
We can either dwell on them or learn from them. I choose learning.
Throughout my writing career, I’ve made some poor choices for which I’ve paid the price. While the pain and consequences of those choices are no fun to live out, I like to think I can help someone not make that same mistake. Or, if they made it, too, help them navigate it.
I believe we grow the most when we’re dealing with the tough parts of life. But through them we develop perseverance, wisdom, and resilience, and they are wicked-awesome skills needed in life.
So hang in there and stay strong, my friends.