Don’t let go.
We often hear the phrase, “Let it go.” There’s even a super famous song titled that! It’s true to an extent, but sometimes we need to not let it go.
For example, in a marriage. If there’s an issue with your spouse that is hurting you, making you angry, don’t brush it aside. It’ll come back to haunt you.
And probably at the worst time possible.
Now I’m not saying to bring up every single little thing, because I think the word for that is nag. But if something’s on your mind and is coming up more often then not, it needs to be addressed.
One thing my sweet hubby and I did early on in our marriage was to have monthly “State of the Marriage” talks.
It’d be a date-night type situation at a favorite restaurant. We’d come into the date with a few things on our mind to chat about: 1). A couple things that are going well in the marriage. 2). A couple things that were not working or frustrating us. 3). Asking each other, “What do you need more of from me?”
Knowing that we were going to have this meeting helped let the little things go but helped us address things that might cause strife in our marriage.
Now some couples might need one of these meetings every couple of weeks, and that’s ok. As long as it’s agreed upon by both parties and you stay constructive vs attacking.
That’s why it helps to have it at a restaurant. You can’t easily walk out on the other person or start shouting.
I mean, you could, but it’s less likely when you are in public. That helps things stay civil.
At least it did for us. We learned a lot about each other and how to communicate assertively instead of aggressively with each other.
It taught me how to hold on to my marriage, one of the most important things to me.
I believe a variation of this concept can work in any situation. Work relationships, friendships, and family interactions. Knowing you have a voice and a safe environment to talk about things can help conflict resolution. Because, let’s face it, we will find strife in all areas of our lives, not just our close relationships.
Stay strong, my friends, and hold on!